Friday, 2005-05-27, 08:52:24 pm, @home

Haven't written for a long time. Okay, this site was down for a long time, too.

So: here I am!

Am I able to recall what was going on the last few months? No, I don't think so. So, the least I can do is to start all over again. To cover the moment, just as I did before.

But before what? Before I felt to have to take this site down in order to think some certain things over.

I realized, I'm not through with my mom's death. It's very much harder to get on with it than I thought. I miss her.

I realized, I made mistakes in the past and I still have failures right now - and I will have in the future.

I realized (once again), life ain't easy.

But in the end I realized one special thing in particular: true, deep and honest love might be the greatest gift on Gods earth.

I'm not an easy person, my dear neither is. That doesn't make our life very simple, but it works - and it works very well, indeed.

Apparently endless moments of joy and fun, wonderful hours together with those awesome kids and my gorgeous dear - that's what made me come alive again, what brought me back my original strength and makes me keep my head up high.

Since weeks, I'm able to be on my own again, to live my life again and to remain strong.