Wednesday, 2004-01-21, 06:47:29 pm, @home

Every now and then...

 ... I think about my past
 ... I think about my future
 ... I think about love
 ... 'n I think about hate

 ... I think about what's been
 ... I think about what could have been
 ... I think about what you did 'n what I did
 ... I think about what we could have done more

 ... I think about you and I

Folks, those of you frequently reading those lines in my diary might know how I think, how I work my things out. I'm usually straight, I mostly know how to feel and solve my problems or situations. I dunno how to solve that situation now.

I'd like to call her, but I don't want to.
I'd like to love her, but I won't.
I'd like to date others a lot, but I can't.
I'd like to tell how I feel, but I don't know how.

There's definitely more than just some feelings. There's something hurting inside me so much, I can't even tell. Sometimes, I'd simply like to burst with silent noise and disappear in a puff of desperation.

What crappy situation is that?